Lately, though, I find myself with less patience. I am sure it has a lot (everything) to do with the stress in our house right now. Horatio is leaving in 5 days.
Every time one of the children challenges me, lately, I find myself wanting to just put a stop to the whining or complaining or misbehaving. I don’t have the patience to wait it out.
I’ve been a bit more stern and am putting a stop to the negative behaviors quickly, but a thought occurred to me. Being tough is tiring.
The past week, and the 5 days to come, have been and will be, very stressful. It is draining to deal with everything that is going on. I realized that it would be much easier to let the kids just have what they want and get on with it.
I have up to two years of these days ahead of me. Which kids will I have at the end of the deployment? Spoiled brats who get everything they want? Or timid, well behaved kids who cower when I walk into the room?
Hopefully neither. I will make a conscious effort to be a good single mother. Keep them in line but with a soft touch.
One thing I am pretty sure of is that I'll end up with at least one of the boys sharing my bed much of the time. The littlest one sleeps much longer when he is in bed with me. More sleep is something I find hard to pass up.
Time will tell.